GUESTS

There is a difference between having family and visitors sleeping over and having houseguests. We live in a big old 1840s farmhouse with an 1880s addition that added a back kitchen and 2 large bedrooms with walk-in closets above the original kitchen. A separate staircase gives access to these rooms that were forgotten for many years. They were not heated. The plaster on the ceilings was cracked and falling. The rooms stored debris from different generations. During the 1980s we took in several families who needed a place for a few months. This was the beginning of a ministry of hospitality. 

After 2 winters of family and children, one bathroom, no TV, no internet or Wi-Fi or devices, we gutted these 2 upstairs rooms, added electricity and heat, turned the larger closet into a bathroom, removed the other closet, and voila - we had 2 large guestrooms. We bought a new waterbed for ourselves and moved the antique 4 poster bed into the newly named Blue Room and another bed into The Brown Room. These rooms were kept ever ready for guests. And they came. Hundreds of them. Not all at the same time. They came from all over Canada and all over the world. Some stayed for a night. Some for a week or 2 and some for a few  months and even a year or more. Individuals or whole families. Missionaries. Quilt retreats. Katimavik students. Family. Guernsey friends. Homeless teens. The bathroom walls and ceiling became a guest book. We have been enriched as guests shared their cultures.

With houseguests in one upstairs part of the house with a bathroom and the family in the other upstairs part, there was a separation of space. The downstairs was common ground.  We, and I mean me, needed to have our own space to withdraw to.

Something we learned from houseguests. It could bring out the best in us. Or, it could bring out the worst in us. Ken and I learned much about ourselves and each other in those days. Sometimes we were drawn closer together as we prayed together for our guests with difficulties in their lives. Other times there developed a wedge between us as we unknowingly took on some of the crap they brought in with them. We eventually learned to ask God to show us the lesson he wanted us to learn so we could grow and move on.   

We discovered that we use our best manners with other people and saved the anger and frustrations for each other. How did we feed all those visitors? We live on a farm and have (had before we sold the cows) all the milk we ever needed and lots of beef. We had a big vegetable garden and froze and canned food to last the rest of the year. We also learned to make do with what we had. Second helpings were not always optional. Guests helped with the dishes and meal prep. They were part of the family and often had responsibilities in the barn with animals and chores. This is not a hotel with room service. 

With our son and his family now living in the 4 rooms in the main upstairs, Ken and I have moved up to the guest rooms. This past summer, as we celebrated our 50+ years of marriage and had many family visiting and a lot of guests coming, we put yet another toilet in a hall closet. There is less drama on getting ready for school mornings. Also, our son has a fancy trailer with heat and air conditioning sitting out in the yard that sleeps 8. This has been an incredible blessing. 

So, yes, Guests have played a huge part in developing our marriage. 

Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it (Heb 13:2).